


Through a Mother's Eyes

by bertererei



Series: How the Mighty Fall [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Background Grisha x Carla, Child Soldiers, Gen, Manga Spoilers, OOC, POV Outsider, Warrior!Eren AU, discrimination against Eldians, mild violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2020-10-13
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:55:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26983228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bertererei/pseuds/bertererei
Summary: Child raising is never easy, especially when you're an Eldian and your child is one Eren Jaeger. But Carla has a great support system. They'll make it work.
Relationships: Eren Yeager & Everyone, Eren Yeager & Zeke
Series: How the Mighty Fall [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2084955
Comments: 15
Kudos: 319
Collections: attack on titan fics





	Through a Mother's Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> "Don't you get tired of writing Warrior!Eren, Berrie?" you reasonably ask.
> 
> "But I ate boba yesterday," I protest as if this makes sense.
> 
> You guys know the drill by now. It's a hand-wavy Warrior!Eren AU. Except from Carla's POV today. Just go with it.
> 
> This does have manga spoilers in terms of Annie's & Reiner's backstories as well as inclusion of Marley Arc characters.
> 
> Warning: Warrior!Eren AU. Child soldiers. Discrimination against Eldians. Outsider POV. Background Grisha x Carla (because they're married). Manga spoilers. Mild violence (There's a scene where a finger gets cut off. And also that scene of Annie's dad's leg.). OOC.

Eren is five months old when he finally stops crying every time Zeke holds him in his arms.

A quiet exclamation of delight escapes from Zeke's mouth before he turns to Carla with the widest grin she has ever seen on his face.

"He's not crying!" Zeke whispers, looking just seconds away from bursting with excitement.

Carla feels relieved at the sight. She had been so worried the two wouldn't get along. But it seems her worries are for naught.

She grins back, feelings just as excited. "You're on your way to being a fine big brother."

He beams so sweetly that she can't help but to ruffle his hair in fondness.

*

Zeke takes his new position as the older brother very seriously.

He watches Eren like a hawk to make sure that the small baby doesn't do something he shouldn't like sticking his finger inside an electric socket or putting any little thing he finds on the ground (most often dirty laundry) in his mouth.

He scolds any adult that dare not follow proper procedures when handling a baby. For example, you must wash your hands with soap for a minimum of thirty seconds before being allowed to pick Eren up. Grisha is often the target for such scolding ("But I'm a doctor! My hands are always clean!" Grisha would protest. To which, Zeke would roll his eyes and respond with "Do you know how many patients you see in a day? You're always covered in germs.").

He reads books about handling babies with dedication that makes Carla wander exactly which one of them had the baby. Then he would explain to the rest of the family of what he read and compare and contrast the information found with what he has observed with Eren. Carla is pretty sure Zeke's baby notes about Eren is much more detailed than her's.

He informs any new patients that come to the clinic that Eren is the first priority. If they cannot stand a baby crying randomly throughout their visit, he politely tells them that the general hospital is also open for business ("Zeke, you need an advanced Marleyan permission to enter the general hospital," Grandpa once tried to reason. Zeke thought about that very seriously before replying in an equally serious manner, "They should have thought about that before they complained about Eren.").

The only time he isn't by Eren's side is when he has to be at the Warrior Headquarter. Carla has no doubts that he talks everyone's ears off about Eren to everyone he meets. At least, that's the only explanation she has as to why everyone in the interment zone seems to know every little bit about Eren. It won't be a lie to say that she feels like she learns more about her youngest when she's gossiping with other people of Liberio, and this is counting the Marleyan guards at the gates.

She once tried to make the argument that a newborn baby while running a clinic was too hard of a work, which was why Zeke needed to take a break from his Warrior Candidate duties for a bit to help out at home. No surprise, none of the Marleyan higher ups accepted it. She personally thought it was a good excuse, though.

"It's alright," Zeke told her when the Marleyan officers scoffed at them. "This just means that the time I do have with Eren is precious!"

Carla wishes she can bottle even a pinch of that kindness and sprinkle it on the Marleyan officers. Even that little would be better than what they are now. And if Zeke's kindness can't rub off on them, then maybe they'll start sneezing nonstop until they realize they should be kinder.

It doesn't help her situation at all, but it made Zeke laugh, which is really all she can ask for as an Eldian.

*

Of course, it's not all fun and games.

Eren is but a baby who cannot communicate. There's only so much he can understand of Zeke and other people around him. Even Zeke's seemingly endless patience hits a wall after Eren wakes them all up for the fourth time that night.

"I'm begging you. Please tell me what's wrong!" Zeke begs the crying baby.

Carla sighs and enters their shared room with an apologetic smile. After giving Zeke a small thank you of a head pat, she picks up Eren and tries to soothe him with a soft lullaby. As it did the first three times, Eren calms and falls asleep. She has no doubt that he will be up in a few hours to wake them all up again.

"Zeke, why don't I watch him? I get the feeling he's going to be like this for the rest of the night."

The look of hurt makes Carla feel horribly guilty. So she quickly rushes to explain that he didn't do anything wrong.

"You have a mission tomorrow, don't you? Having a good night's rest is important. I'm sure Eren will be more agreeable tomorrow."

"Just for tonight?" Zeke asks.

Carla smiles and gently caresses his cheek. "Just for tonight."

*

Although it makes her sad to admit, Eren's first word is "Zee."

His bright eyes look up as he tilts his head to the side adorably. Then with perhaps the cutest voice in the entire world, Eren reaches his hands up and says, "Zee!"

Carla decides to forgive it because it's much too cute to watch Zeke swoon as he hugs Eren gently in his arms.

*

The duty of teaching one's child the history of Eldia and Marley falls heavily upon the parents. Carla prepared herself for that mentally, but it's still hard to do now that she's sitting next to Eren.

At this young of an age, there's no way that Eren would understand any of this. He'll learn how to parrot these words in front of everyone else, just to prove that he is a loyal Eldian. And isn't that messed up? He can't even read. What do you mean teach him of the genocide and install into him the loyalty all Eldians must show Marleyans?

But if he doesn't know these words, their family will surely come under fire for not being loyal enough. After what happened with Dina, it's hard to come up with a justification that won't make them look like traitors in Marley's eyes.

"Please forgive me."

For not being able to protect him properly. For not being able to let him grow up without fear.

For bringing him into the world as an Eldian.

*

Eren is three years old when Zeke is first sent away on a month-long mission.

Carla prepares herself for a month worth of tears and screaming. But Eren is surprisingly mature. He waves goodbye to Zeke and plays with his toys (all hand-me-downs from Zeke who enthusiastically helped Carla clean and inspect them to make sure they were all baby-proof) without once calling for "Zee."

Grandpa teases him by asking, "Don't you miss your big brother?"

"Zee said don't cry and be good," Eren tells him matter-of-factly.

Eren and Zeke both are much too cute for Carla's heart. She wants to hug them tight and protect them from the world.

*

To his credit, Eren does not show any sign of distress that Zeke is gone until Zeke returns. Then it's as if he suddenly realized that Zeke hasn't been by his side this entire time.

Eren's eyes go wide at the sight of his brother. His lips tremble. With an uncertainty that Carla knows she shouldn't call cute (at least not out loud and not right now), he slowly reaches for his brother.

The gates haven't opened yet, so Carla makes sure to hold onto him in case he darts forward for his brother on the other side. It's only then that she realizes something important. They focused so much on how Eren would miss Zeke that they forgot to account for how much Zeke would end up missing Eren.

At the sight of his little brother, Zeke bolts the minute the gates of the interment zone are open. He makes a beeline for Eren. Carla dares to argue that Zeke probably broke a record to reach his little brother and hold him tightly.

Then and only then, Eren lets out small sounds that sound suspiciously a lot like he's crying.

"What took you, Zee?" Eren sobs.

Carla decides to be a decent human today and not tease her sons about it.

*

There's always a line of injured at the general hospital whenever the Warrior Division returns from a mission. The longer the mission lasts, the longer the line is (and those that cannot fit or aren't critical enough for the hospital get sent to the clinic). Officially, they are called soldiers of the Eldian Volunteer Army. Everyone else in the interment zone calls them low lives and criminals that are a step away from being sent to Heaven.

Zeke insists that they're not that, though.

"They're a big proponent of what we as the Warrior Division do. Without their help and support, the missions would take twice as long."

"Then I'll make sure to thank them," she says.

Zeke beams.

He's such a sweet kid. Carla worries that his kindness will be taken advantage of.

"Zee," Eren says, pulling on his brother's hand for his attention. "I help, too."

Zeke laughs and picks Eren up in his arms. "Yup! You're the most helpful!"

They're so cute like this. Carla hopes that the next mission won't be for a long while.

*

It's not quite that Eren is a bad child, mind. It's just... If even an ounce of Zeke's kindness and gentle nature had rubbed off of him, Carla thinks that Eren would be easier to handle. By that, she really means that she worries his headstrong personality would get him into trouble with the Marleyans and other Eldians who are always itching to report any wrong-doings.

"No! I don't want to!"

"You're going to catch a cold if you don't get dressed!" Grisha begs, looking to be a second away from tears.

Zeke's kindness is from Grisha. Both of them bend much too easily when Eren gets even just a little bit pouty like this. Grandma and Grandpa are much too charmed by a lively child to raise their hands to scold him.

Carla reaches over and grabs Eren by the ear. "Eren, get dressed!"

"Aww! I don't wanna! Mom!" Eren whines.

"If you won't dress as a human, then I'll stop treating you as one. Is that what you'd like?"

Eren bares his teeth at her like a beast. "But that's what we are, isn't it? We're Eldian Devils!"

It catches her off-guard enough to release her hold on his ear. Eren uses this chance to hide behind Zeke and sticks his tongue at her. But how is she supposed to scold him when those words reflect her own thoughts? If they cannot be seen as humans in the eyes of everyone of the world, then maybe it is better to-

"That's wrong, Eren," Zeke says, cutting Carla's thoughts short. He takes his brother's hand to stop him from running. "We are not beasts. We are not devils. And to prove that, I am a member of the Warrior Division. We are human. So won't you please put on your clothes?"

Eren pouts. Carla isn't sure if he really understood all that, but he's most definitely sulking like he has been scolded.

On the other hand, Zeke is looking at his little brother seriously, waiting for an answer. Carla is beyond amazed by the level-headedness and maturity that Zeke always shows. It makes Carla wonder if it's because she is lacking as a mother. She can't even scold Eren properly and have to rely on Zeke for help.

"Zeke, you're such a good kid," she says, ruffling his hair. "Please don't ever change."

"I-I'm a good kid, too!" Eren protests.

"Good kids wear clothes," Carla tells him.

With an annoyed growl, Eren crosses his arms in front of himself. "Fine! I'll wear it!"

*

Even if it's not out of malicious intent, Carla hates the question, "Eren, are you going to join the Warrior Division like your brother?"

Her gut reaction is no. Of course not! It's bad enough that they have to lose Zeke to the Marleyans for so many hours in a day. But to lose both her sons? But the minute she says something like that a rumor will start to fly, won't it? That Carla holds anti-Marleyan values and needs to be rid of. And what would that accomplish aside from forcing her family to to pay for her careless words? If it's not an immediate sentence to Heaven, it'll be a sentence to become a part of the Eldian Volunteer Army.

Eren's answer every time is to grin brightly and say, "I'm going to be a Warrior like Zee!"

Carla knows her expression would show her honest feelings, so she always make sure to look away and keep silent. But it seems that Grandma noticed.

"Eren probably gets his honesty from you," she says lightly. "Does it scare you that much?"

"I don't like that Zeke has to go either. But to send Eren as well," Carla sighs and lets the rest of her sentence hang there. Because they both know exactly what she's worried about.

"Well, I'm not sure if this is any comfort to you, but don't forget that they changed the way the Warrior Division members are picked. You can't just walk in to the division and be a part of it. You have a pass a test."

That's true.

According to the rumor mill, the Galliards' first born is talented and smart enough to be considered a genius. Eren may be clever, but he's not on a genius level. Carla isn't saying that her son isn't as good as Galliard's first born, but it would be nice if having someone that talented taking the test would lower Eren's chances.

"I feel like a horrible mom for wishing Eren to do poorly," she groans.

Grandma laughs and pats her shoulder sympathetically.

*

"Is it important to you that you be a Warrior Candidate?" Carla finally asks Eren when they're alone.

"Zee is one," Eren says.

"Do you want to be like your brother?"

Eren purses his lips in deep thought. Then quietly, he says, "I want to be human."

She had thought that he wouldn't be understand those words that Zeke had said back then. But it seems that she underestimated her youngest.

"You don't have to do that to prove anything, Eren. Of course, you're human," Carla tries to say.

Eren grabs his armband and shows it to her without taking it off. "Then why do we wear this?"

Carla feels herself freeze, unable to respond.

Eren then points at the walls of the internment zone. "Why can't we leave?"

Because, because, because. There are a thousand and one excuses at the tip of Carla's tongue. Every single one of them begins with "the savior" Marleyans and ends with "the barbaric" Eldians. Every single one of them prove that they are not human. Just monsters in human skin, waiting for a chance to destroy the world. Because that's all they are good for. And they should be grateful that Marley is willing to help them, to take a chance on them.

"I... I'm sorry," Carla finds herself stammering out before she can stop herself. She pulls Eren into her arms, wishing desperately that she had a different answer, that she wasn't tearing up with her own helplessness, that she knew how to make this better. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

Eren never brings up this topic again.

But Carla fears that all she did was traumatize him from speaking of it to her.

*

Eren is five when he returns home from the Warrior Candidacy Exam with a bloody nose and an armband that marks him a Warrior Candidate like Zeke. Zeke, who went with him to supervise, looks mighty proud as the two of them excitedly tell everyone what happened.

"So Eren, how'd you do it?" Grandpa asks excitedly.

Eren grins widely. "Hand-to-hand! There was this girl that was super good. So I copied what she did, right? It was really good too, because Magath said I passed!"

"Commander Magath," Zeke corrects. "You have to refer to him by his title, Eren."

"You copied a girl and got in? Wait, wasn't she super mad about that? Is that where you got the bloody nose?" Grisha asks worriedly.

"No, I tripped."

Carla imagines that he was much too excited to be able to walk straight. Thank goodness Zeke went with him to make sure he got back home safely.

"So anyways, since I'm now a Warrior Candidate, can we have my favorite tonight?"

They were planning on having Eren's favorite tonight regardless, but there's no harm in letting Eren celebrate. He's cute when he's this excited, even if Carla's own feelings about this is mixed.

*

"Do you have your lunchboxes?" Carla asks.

Zeke looks amused, but Eren rolls his eyes. "Yes."

"And are you sure it's enough food for the two of you? M-maybe we should put in an extra piece of fruit! A-and-"

Grandma gently squeezes Carla's shoulder with a kind smile. "There, there. They're going to be late at this rate."

"Don't worry. I'll keep my eyes on Eren," Zeke promises.

"And I'll watch Zee," Eren says proudly.

Grandpa ruffles Eren's hair. "You two take care of each other."

"I'm looking forward to the fun stories you'll bring home," Grisha tells them.

Is it because they've already gone through this once with Zeke? Carla feels childish comparatively.

"Mom!" Eren calls, waving, "Be good and don't cry!"

How embarrassing to be scolded by her youngest like that.

"Alright."

Carla waves after her sons.

*

Grandma keeps Carla busy by making her run errands all day. By the time the boys come home, she's exhausted.

But that doesn't mean that she won't smile and welcome them home as warmly as she can.

*

Eren stops calling Zeke "Zee" a few days after his first day at the Warrior Headquarter.

Carla assumes Eren is taking steps in trying to see mature, so she doesn't pay it much attention.

*

The first person that Eren brings home... Rather, the first person who follows Eren home from the Warrior Headquarter is a quiet girl named Annie with a rather terrifying glare.

"Mom, make her go away," Eren whispers to Carla like she has any control over what this scary girl does.

"Eren, that's no way to treat a guest. Go invite her in," Grandma interjects thankfully.

With a look on his face that clearly says that he hates this, Eren lets Annie into the clinic from the yard where she has been glaring at him the entire time. She glances around the clinic with slight interest before turning her attention to him.

"So you've accepted my offer of rematch."

... Rematch...? Oh, is this the girl that Eren copied the moves of? No wonder she keeps glaring at Eren. Should Carla make him apologize?

Eren shakes his head. "Don't be stupid. Here, have an apple and go home."

Annie takes the apple in a surprised silence. Is that a blush on her face? Carla covers her mouth and exchanges a look with Grandma.

"Then just for today, I'll retreat with this," Annie says, holding the apple close to herself.

"Good riddance," Eren mumbles once she leaves.

"Eren, you can't be mean," Grandma scolds. "She seems like such a nice girl. You should invite her more often."

"I don't wanna! She's annoying! She keeps trying to talk to me when I want to talk to Zeke!"

Carla sighs in exasperation. "You can talk to Zeke when you get home."

"But I want to talk to Zeke whenever!" Eren whines. "He's always with the Warriors or the Commander. It's hard to find the time to be with him. On top of that, because of business, he can't walk home with me. It's not fair that she keeps trying to steal my time!"

"You can't keep hogging Zeke all to yourself. I'm sure he wants to play with his friends, too," Carla reasons.

Eren shakes his head. "Zeke doesn't have any friends. So it's fine."

Please don't say such hurtful things, even if Zeke isn't in the room.

"It's not that Zeke doesn't have friends. It's that he wasn't able to make any because he was worried about you," Grandma scolds. "Eren, why don't we do this? Until Zeke makes... let's say three friends, you are not allowed to talk to him at Headquarter."

That is probably the best way to deal with this situation. Carla is beyond impressed. She didn't even consider setting up a condition like that. She wonders if that shows her immaturity as a parent. There's still so much for her to learn.

"But that's not fair! Zeke sucks at talking to people!"

"Eren."

The stern voice is enough to make even Carla straighten.

Eren pouts, his eyes starting to water, but he reluctantly nods. "Okay. B-but I can talk to Zeke at home, right?"

It'll be too cruel to not allow that.

"Yes, you can talk to Zeke at home."

Eren looks glum, but he nods in agreement. Carla can't help but to find it endlessly endearing that Eren doesn't seem to even think about saying no.

He's surprisingly a good kid.

*

Annie returns the next day in a similar fashion, standing in the yard of the clinic after following Eren home. And the next, and the next. It gets to a point where everyone laughingly lets Annie in without any fuss whenever they spot her coming.

"Thanks for being friends with Eren," Carla says, even though she is pretty sure Eren would disagree.

There's the smallest of pauses before Annie blushes and smiles at the ground. "We're friends."

Well, you know, Carla always did want a daughter.

"You're always welcome, Annie. Ignore Eren and come in whenever you want!"

"Mom, you traitor!"

*

Carla might always be underestimating how much Zeke looks forward to his little brother's affections.

"I-I'm not saying that he needs to be by my side always. I'm just... sad that he doesn't even glance in my direction the minute we get to the Headquarter," Zeke sighs. "He's always hanging out with the other kids. A-and I know that's good for him. I just... feel a bit lonely."

She feels nothing but stabs of guilt at the look of dejection on Zeke's face. Saying that they did this in order to help the two of them get more friends seem like such a flimsy excuse in front of his sadness.

"Zeke, maybe you should also start making friends your own age," Carla tries instead. "I think it'll be good for both of you."

"I'll... I'll try," Zeke mumbles softly.

Carla feels guilty, but she knows it'll be better for both of them in the long run. But for now, she decides to keep quiet about the plans to get them separate rooms.

*

The next person that follows Eren home is a scowling boy that looks a second away from starting a fight. Carla is honestly terrified for Eren and Annie, both of whom are hiding behind the kitchen counter of the clinic with pale faces.

"Okay, but in my defense, I didn't think he'd get mad," Eren says quietly.

Annie nods.

"What did you two do?" Carla asks. She crouches down so that she's also hidden from the view of the window.

From the way Eren hesitates, Carla has no doubts that her youngest is in the wrong here.

"I... I er... t-tripped him," Eren says quietly. "A-and he dropped his sammy."

His sandwich? Carla is horrified that her youngest would dare waste food like this.

"He started to cry, so I called him a baby," Annie adds.

And neither of them saw what was wrong with this until that angry boy chased them back to the clinic? Carla sighs.

"Alright. The two of you are going to walk outside and apologize."

"But what if he kicks me?" Eren whines.

Carla clicks her tongue. "Then you'd deserve it. But until you apologize, you have no right to run away."

Annie seems to consider those words seriously. She turns to Eren and stands up. Seeing that, Eren reluctantly follows. The two of them head back out. Carla watches the three of them starting to talk before turning to make a small snack for the three of them to enjoy.

The next time she looks up out the window, both boys are on the ground with Annie preening over them.

It looks like Eren got himself a new friend. Carla feels glad for them.

*

"Zeke, how come you don't bring any friends home?" Grandma asks one day.

Carla thinks that might have been a little insensitive a thing to ask him. But she's also curious, so she doesn't play interference.

"We live in a clinic. It's kind of awkward to bring friends here," Zeke points out.

"It's not because you have no friends, right?" Grandma asks, watching Zeke's expression carefully.

Zeke looks amused at least. "I have friends. We just find it awkward to hang out here."

That's fair enough. Zeke is at that age where he doesn't want his family to be looking over his shoulder. That's probably why he's been returning from Headquarter at different times than Eren, even though they leave together in the morning (Well, Eren did say that it's because of business, but Carla doubts it's always because of business). He's probably tired of taking care of his little brother, too. And now that Carla thinks about it, they have been relying on Zeke a lot when it comes to Eren, haven't they? No wonder Zeke is trying to find ways and places where Eren won't be to hang out. But because Zeke is a good kid like that, he won't dare say that where Eren might overhear.

Don't worry, Zeke. Carla's got his back!

That night, when Eren comes to find Zeke with a book in his hand for his bedtime story, Carla steps in.

"Eren, you're a Warrior Candidate now. You don't need a bedtime story. Come on, you can read it yourself if you really want one. Don't bother Zeke over this."

The soft exclamation of hurt is not from Eren.

Carla turns to look at Zeke, who is staring at her in pure shock and betrayal. Did... he want to read Eren a bedtime story? H-huh? Did Carla misunderstand something?

Eren must have missed the look on Zeke's face because he's pouting at his book. "F-fine. I can read it."

"W-why... why don't you read it to Zeke instead? I'm sure he'd love to see how much you've improved!" Carla says quickly.

Please don't look so brightly at her. She feels guilty enough as it is.

"Zeke! Zeke! I'm going to read to you!" Eren says with a happy grin.

The grin on Zeke's face looks just as excited. "I can't wait!"

You know what? It's not like it hurts anyone. The two of them clearly look happy with this arrangement. There's no harm in letting them be.

*

Few days later, the scowling boy returns with another boy around his age. The two look similar enough and they both have Warrior Candidate armbands, so Carla guesses that these two must be the Galliard brothers.

The other boy nudges the scowling boy with an encouraging smile. Then after a second, the scowling boy turns towards the clinic with an embarrassed blush on his face.

"H-hey! We're going beetle hunting! W-want to... c-come with?"

There's a second of pause as the two boys wait for some kind of a response. When none comes, the scowling boy must have hit a new level of embarrassment. His face turns even redder.

"Hey!" he yells even louder. "Eren! Come out here right now!"

Carla opens the window. "Eren went to the market to pick up some greens. Do you want to come in and wait for him?"

The scowling boy looks like he might burst into tears. The other boy by his side laughs and pats the scowling boy's shoulder.

"Would it be alright if we do?" the other boy asks with a polite smile.

Carla lets the two of them in.

"I'm Marcel," the other boy introduces. "And this is my brother, Porco. We're all Warrior Candidates together with Eren."

"Thank you for thinking of Eren," Carla says.

Marcel beams. Porco blushes and mumbles something that sounds a bit like "I wasn't thinking of him particularly."

What charming kids. Carla hopes that they'll be Eren's friends.

"Please take good care of Eren in the future, too!"

"Who's taking care of me?" Eren asks as he walks back into the kitchen with the groceries. His eyes land on the two brothers and groans while dropping the groceries to the ground. "Mom, why'd you let them in?"

"It's your fault for not being home!" Porco snaps.

Marcel covers his brother's mouth to stop him from saying anything more. "Then we'll be taking our leave with your son, ma'am!"

"You guys have fun," Carla calls.

Over Eren's protests and shouts for them to stop, the two brothers drag Eren out. Carla likes these two already.

*

"I think this is a good time as any," Grandpa says one day over dinner. "But Zeke, isn't it about time that we got you your own room?"

Zeke freezes. Carla thinks that this is actually not that good of a time.

"I don't wanna!" Eren protests. "Zeke has no friends, so I want to share rooms! Otherwise, he's going to cry because he's lonely."

Eren, you can't say things like that!

Despite thinking such things, Carla has to cover her mouth to stop herself from bursting out laughing.

"I-I do have friends!" Zeke says immediately.

Carla does feel bad that they're all giving Zeke looks of disbelief. But it's just... a little hard to believe when Zeke has never once mentioned anyone other than family members or other Warrior Candidates who were recently on a mission with him. She should, for his sake, not mention that, though.

"A-and I think it's fine that we're sharing rooms. There's no need to trouble everyone to move everything around," Zeke concludes.

"It's not trouble at all," Grisha tells him. "You're at that age where privacy should be the most important to you. It must have been annoying to deal with Eren on top of that. We're sorry for not noticing it sooner."

Carla is certain that both Grisha and Grandpa missed the point. It takes everything she has to not let any laugher slip out.

"I-I'm not annoying!" Eren insists.

Zeke nods in agreement. "Eren isn't annoying. I'm fine with the current arrangement."

"But we need to get Eren a bigger bed, too. It'll be easier to change your room situation while we're at it," Grandpa reasons.

It seems that Zeke can't come up with a good excuse to combat that. And now that he's gone quiet, Eren realizes that he lost the one person who was supporting him.

"Fine! Change the rooms! I'll just sleep in Zeke's bed!" Eren declares.

"Don't do that. We're getting you a bigger bed, so stop stealing your brother's. Don't you think it's sad that Zeke has been sleeping on the ground for the last few days?"

Eren pouts. "That was his punishment for eating my dessert."

"Carla, don't smile like you find this cute," Grisha says, changing this around on her.

They are really cute, though! But Grisha probably won't appreciate her saying that out loud. Let's see, what can she say to help with this situation?

"Well, it's fine, isn't it? Just because you have separate rooms doesn't mean you'll stop seeing each other. It's not like Zeke is moving out."

Eren looks glum, but he reluctantly agrees. Zeke offers a forced smile. They're so dramatic, acting like this is the end of the world. Carla never had siblings. So seeing them like this is always exciting.

"B-bed time story!" Eren says suddenly.

They all stare at him, waiting for him to clarify. He blushes at their combined stares.

"I-I still want my bed time story. T-to read to Zeke."

"Of course!" Zeke says before anyone else can say anything otherwise.

Carla finds it a thousand times adorable.

*

Eren is six when he is first sent on an away mission.

The only reason why Carla doesn't completely freak out is because Zeke is going on the same mission.

"You don't have to worry at all! I'll keep my eyes on him!"

"You're such a good brother, Zeke. I'm sorry to be leaving Eren in your care again."

Zeke shakes his head. "Not at all. I love Eren!"

It's something that Carla has thought of in passing, but isn't she relying a bit too much on Zeke's kind heart? Zeke probably wants to live his own life and have friends his own age. Not watch out for Eren every second. But in the same breath, she can't quite bring herself to voice that out loud right before this first away mission.

Sorry, she apologizes in her head. Once the mission is over, she'll properly take responsibility for Eren. But until then...

"I'm not saying this because you did anything wrong, Zeke," Carla says to make sure that they have that straight first. "I just want to make sure that we're on the same page. When watching over Eren, you know to be firm with him, right? Just because he begs and pleads, you can't just give in to whatever he asks for."

Zeke's cheeks flush. "I-I know that. I'm not dad."

"What time is Eren's bedtime?"

"9 pm," Zeke answers.

"Eren is allowed how many desserts?"

"One a day. Not one a meal."

Carla sighs in relief and ruffles Zeke's hair. "Thank you for your hard work, big brother."

Zeke beams.

*

Carla gets to learn about the new Warrior Division members' parents while they all wait for their children to return.

Annie's father is an awkward man who looks like he's very uncomfortable to be sharing this space with the other parents. But the minute Carla remarks about how well Annie fights, he beams and begins to detail all of the training plans that he gave her. His attitude changes yet again when Carla mentions that her sons are Zeke and Eren. It looks like he doesn't want to snap at her for the things that Eren did (Because of course, her youngest did something stupid), but he most definitely blames her for not "raising" Eren right. Carla thinks that he can go stuff it.

The woman named Karina Braun is the mother of this Reiner that Carla has yet to meet. She is overly polite and cautious. But her eyes are sharp as if she's always on the search for something. It makes Carla infinitely cautious. She knows exactly what these types of people are looking for. What happened with Dina was a few years back, but that's doubtlessly something that will be brought up if Carla is too careless. She doesn't want to say something like "Be wary of Reiner" to Eren because she gets the feeling her youngest might take it too far. But she does consider it.

Marcel and Porco's mom seems like a calm person who smiles easily and keeps a conversation light while dodging any questions that might reveal anything remotely close to her. Their dad, however, easily flusters and struggles to keep his voice at a normal conversation level. Carla sees exactly where the two boys gets their temperament from. When she remarks that, Mrs. Galliard laughs brightly and gives Carla a wink. Just a bit, she thinks they'll be good friends.

The Hoover couple are sweet, if not a little nervous. They both seem like genuinely kind people. Once they feel a little more at ease with the other parents, Carla is certain they'll all get along great. She hopes that Eren brings Bertolt over to play. Or perhaps Bertolt will follow Eren home like everyone else seems to have? It's like Eren has a small line of ducklings behind him, made even funnier by the fact that Eren himself is always trotting after Zeke. She's beyond joyful at how cute that image is.

The only one she doesn't get to meet is Pieck's father who is apparently in the general hospital. In order to pay for her dad's hospital fees, Pieck became a Warrior Candidate. After hearing such a touching story like that, Carla can't help but to feel even more saddened. Pieck will bloody her hands to be a tool for the Marley so that her dad might live a little bit longer. And the Marleys will gladly take advantage of that to lock her into place.

It frightens her that one day, both her sons will be forced into that kind of a horrid situation.

*

Eren and Zeke both return with wide grins on their faces and excited stories about their mission.

Carla prays that their happy smiles when they return will be the norm.

*

That happiness is dashed on Eren's third away mission.

The two returns with tense silence between them. And it's not until the doors to the clinic closes shut behind them that they turn towards each other.

"Why can't you just listen to your orders? You were told to stand down!" Zeke snaps.

It's the first time that Carla has ever seen Zeke lose his temper. To be honest, she's pretty sure it's the first time that any of them have ever seen him lose his temper. Sure, Zeke gets frustrated and annoyed. But to become so angry that he starts yelling? It catches her so off-guard that she can't do anything but watch in disbelief.

"I told you! I saw an opening, so I took it. Orders or not, it's what gave us a successful mission."

"We would have gotten that successful mission regardless! You were reckless, and you put everyone else in danger. Just because you got lucky this time-"

Eren rolls his eyes. "You wish it was luck because you don't have the balls to do what I did."

Carla doesn't know where Eren learned to talk like that, but this isn't okay. When you're fighting someone, verbally or physically, you fight with your honor on the line. Attacking someone's personal beliefs and belittling the other in an effort to make oneself look "just" is the same as admitting defeat; your point was so unjustifiable that you couldn't even make an effort to fight for it.

She grabs her youngest by the shoulder to stop him from running.

"Eren, that's too far. Apologize to your brother."

"Why do I have to apologize when Zeke's in the wrong?" comes Eren's own temper. "Mom, you don't even know what happened, so butt out!"

"Don't talk to your mother like that!" Grisha says firmly.

Eren must have felt cornered. He knocks Carla's hand off of him and runs to his room. Grisha lets out a soft sigh and motions that he'll go after Eren. That leaves Carla, Grandma, and Grandpa with Zeke.

Her heart aches when she turns to face Zeke. He looks to be a second away from tears, struggling to keep his emotion in check.

"What's wrong with being a coward?" he asks, voice quivering. "If it means that everyone lives for that much longer, then isn't it a good thing? Why do we have to take unnecessary risks and lose more people when there are ways around it?"

Carla isn't too sure what she can say to comfort Zeke. Eren is right in the sense that she really doesn't know the situation. But if she were to put together what she knows about her sons' personalities and the bits that she heard, her conclusion would be...

"Zeke, I don't think Eren's issue with you is that he thinks you're a coward. His issue is most likely that your orders sound to him like you don't trust him."

"Of course, I don't trust him! He's just a kid!"

And therein lies the issue.

Both Grandma and Grandpa look like they picked up what Carla is getting at. That's good. Maybe they'll be able to explain-

A loud crash from Eren's room catches their attention. Looks like Grisha said the wrong thing to their youngest. Carla is going to have to have a firm talk with Eren about not throwing things when he's angry. That's a dangerous habit to be in when Eren works with Marleyans. Although she says that, she won't be shocked if Eren picked it up from those damned Marleyans.

"Carla, I have an idea," Grandma says. "You go help Grisha and bring Eren to the kitchen. Zeke, you and Eren will make dinner once a week together."

"W-with Eren? But he's not... e-exactly..." Zeke stammers, shocked.

Yeah, Carla's with Zeke on this. But Grandpa makes a motion at Carla to trust them on this, so Carla figures this must be one of those experience things that she has yet to learn.

"I'll go talk to Grisha and Eren."

*

Grisha and Eren are at a stalemate. Grisha looks a second away from losing his own temper, and Eren has hit his emotional capacity for anger that he has begun to cry. Carla is of the opinion that because Grisha raised such a sweet-tempered boy like Zeke, he doesn't really know how to deal with a storm like Eren. But that's fine. That's why Carla is here.

There's a book on the ground. From the way it's sprawled, Carla concludes that this is what Eren threw. Luckily, it doesn't seem like Grisha was hit. Good. Eren wasn't aiming at someone. He just wanted to throw something. Carla can work with that.

"Eren, do you know why we're so angry?" Carla starts.

"Because I called Zeke a coward. I don't know! I don't care! He's the one in the wrong! Why do you always take his side, no matter what?"

Carla squats so that she's at eye-level with Eren. "You're not giving me a reason to side with you. Why do you feel so upset at Zeke? What did he do that made you feel this way? Instead of talking about that, you attacked Zeke by calling him a coward. Do you understand where we're coming from?"

It looks like the lightbulb turned on. Eren slowly nods, looking guilty.

"Eren, when you're angry, it becomes even more important that you clearly state what the problem is. No one can read your mind. Zeke is going to misunderstand why you're angry and think that you hate him because he is a coward. Is that what you wanted to tell him?"

"No," Eren says, shaking his head. "I-I wasn't... I didn't mean... I'm sorry."

Carla pats Eren's head. "I know. But it's not just me you want to apologize to, right?"

"Dad, I'm sorry," Eren says.

Grisha relaxes. "Please don't throw things when you're angry. You could seriously hurt someone like that."

"Sorry," Eren says. He runs to pick up the book. Carla's sure that he just whispered an apology to the book, too.

"Now let's go apologize to your brother, too."

Eren nods. He puts the book down on his desk and walks back over to them. A little hesitantly, he tugs on Carla's pants leg.

"M-mom, was... Zeke a lot mad?"

"He wasn't mad, Eren. He was hurt."

The guilt on Eren's face is obvious. Carla is sure that this sincerity will come across to Zeke, too. She squeezes his shoulder.

"W-what if he doesn't accept my apology?" Eren asks softly.

Carla doubts that Zeke would ever do that. But it'll be better to keep Eren in suspense so he doesn't get cocky.

"Then you make it up to him until he does."

Eren nods and takes the lead to go talk to his brother.

When Carla moves to follow, Grisha takes her hand in his. He gently presses their shoulders together and gives her a soft smile.

"You should really give yourself more credit," he tells her. "You're already an amazing parent."

Carla feels her cheeks heat up.

How sneaky of him.

But if he's going to play that way, Carla can play along.

*

By the time Carla and Grisha finally join the rest of the family in the kitchen, Zeke and Eren are trying to work together to make dinner. According to Grandma, this is the best and the most efficient way to get them to learn about each other. Carla figures she knows what she's doing, so she (and everyone else) is sitting at the kitchen table, watching the two boys struggle.

"N-no, if you hold the knife like that..." Zeke says, looking torn between taking the knife and cucumbers away from Eren.

Eren shakes his head. "You said I can do this."

Zeke closes his eyes and forces himself to take a deep breath. Then he nods without saying anything else.

Oh, Carla sees what's going on. If it's like this, then Zeke will be forced to slowly acknowledge that Eren isn't that small baby that chased after him any more. And when Eren accidentally cuts his hand by-

"Ow!"

\- holding his knife wrong, Zeke will rush to his side for help. And Eren will understand that his brother wants nothing but for him to do well.

It's a method that Carla would never have thought of. Although Grisha said that she was an amazing parent, she feels that she'll never quite reach this level.

*

One day, Eren and Annie drag to the clinic a protesting boy who is screaming incomprehensibly while sobbing hysterically.

"W-what is this?! Who is this? Eren, Annie, return him!" Grisha demands when he spots them.

"This is Reiner," Eren says. He goes to pat the crying boy's back, but his hand is slapped away. "He was rude to us today. So we're going to punish him. Dad, where's the rope?"

"Apologize to him and take him home," Grisha says sternly.

While Carla does understand where Grisha is coming from, she feels that sending Reiner back would be a bit of a waste. Sure, his mom is a bit weird, but that doesn't mean they're both bad people. What kind of a lesson would she be teaching her children if she were to turn Reiner away now?

"It is the first time Eren brought someone over. I think it's fine to let Reiner stay!" Carla states.

She thinks Reiner said something along the lines of, "I don't want to be here." But due to how much he's crying, she can't really tell.

"Hey, shut up. I can't hear myself think," Eren tells Reiner.

"If you don't shut it, I'll shut you," Annie warns.

Reiner stares at all of them with wide eyes, but he's no longer babbling. He's just hiccupping lightly as the tears continue to fall from his eyes. Carla gives him a smile.

"Would you like some yogurt? We made some last night."

The distrust in Reiner's eyes is obvious. But he seems to take the situation in carefully before he nods. Carla is certain he'll fit in just fine.

*

"Good morning!" comes the loud yell from outside of their clinic.

"Shut up, Porco! Go away! Marcel, take him and leave!" Eren yells back.

"You shut up! You played with Reiner but not me! I'm allowed to be annoying!"

Please yell like this elsewhere.

Despite thinking like that, Carla can't help but to find these overly energetic children endearing.

*

When Eren returns to the clinic that day, he's with Annie, Marcel, and Porco. There's no sign of Reiner. But Carla spots a kid who quickly hides behind a tree by the clinic yard. More people seem to follow Eren home than anything else. She worries what kind of a heartbreaker he's going to be when he's older.

"Aren't you going to invite him?" Carla asks the group that seems to have come in for just a few minutes for Eren to grab something. Is that a screwdriver? Just what are these kids planning to do?

"Bertolt's... weird," Annie tells her. "I don't like him."

"Yeah, he's always staring at Annie. It's creepy," Eren adds.

Bertolt's parents also looked pretty nervous and shy. Perhaps Bertolt struggles with expressing himself? If the entire family is like that, then it's possible that Bertolt never learned, right? It's too sad to leave him alone then.

"Eren, you should take the first step. I bet he's an awkward person who would appreciate help in expressing himself," Carla says.

The looks on all the kids' faces disagree with what Carla just said. But she doesn't think it's right to exclude anyone, especially as Eldians. Their lives are already hard as it is. There's no need to make it worse for anyone else by pointing fingers and pushing people out. No, she wasn't thinking of Mrs. Braun. Why would she be so rude?

"Do you want to invite him or should I?"

As she knew it would, her ultimatum works.

Eren scowls like he hates it, but he diligently goes outside to collect Bertolt. Bertolt flinches when he spots Eren coming and trips and falls to the ground. Without wasting a second, Eren grabs him. Carla can't quite hear what they're saying to each other, but it looks like Bertolt is turning paler and paler. Few seconds later, Bertolt stands up and meekly follows Eren in.

"There. Happy?" Eren grumbles.

Carla pinches his cheeks. "Yes, very. Now go out and have fun, okay?"

She assumes that everything went well. Eren returns home for dinner with exciting stories of all that he accomplished with the others, and she doesn't hear any gossips of something terrible happening from the other parents a few days later. But she does notice that Eren drags Bertolt out of his hiding spot and forces him to stand with the rest of the group until one day, Bertolt doesn't bother hiding anymore. So for now, she decides it's fine.

*

It's rare for Annie to visit with her father and not with Eren. Actually, it's rare for Mr. Leonhart to come to the clinic in general. Carla assumes it's because of Eren. But when Mr. Leonhart comes to the clinic that day, it's with a wide grin on his face and a horrible limp. His leg doesn't look quite right from where she is standing. She assumes it's broken somewhat, but it kind of looks like it's twisted somewhat, too.

"W-what happened to your leg?" Grisha exclaims as he rushes to support him so that Annie doesn't have to.

"Annie graduated today! Hahahaha!" comes the loud laugh. "She is the strongest! She'll be the most useful weapon for Marley!"

The laughter doesn't sound joyful at all. Carla dare say that there's a bite of hysteria to it. It's frightening to hear for her; she can't imagine how Annie must feel. Leaving Mr. Leonhart to her husband, Carla wraps her arms around Annie and pulls her into the kitchen, away from the clinic area.

Annie feels cold in her arms. She is dreadfully still, not reacting to anything that Carla says. Shock, Carla assumes. Her father's leg is broken. Given what Mr. Leonhart says and how Annie is, Carla concludes that they must have been sparring and Annie overdid it. Annie is going to hold the guilt of what she did for the rest of her life. That damned man. Doesn't he know what kind of a scar this will leave on Annie's heart?

"Oh, Annie's over," Eren greets as he returns from the yard.

He must have finished his chore, judging by the grass stains and dirt on his clothes. There's a small part of Carla that wants to tell Eren to not come close, because she honestly fears that he will throw a lit match into this situation, and she doesn't know how flammable Annie is. But is that really up to her to decide? It's possible that Annie does want to watch everything burn so that she can rebuilt from the embers once the fire goes out. If that's how Annie deals with guilt best, then is it really right of Carla to stop this? Best thing to do is probably to just explain to Eren what's going on.

"Eren, Annie's father is hurt. So-"

"I broke his leg," Annie tells Eren.

Carla feared that might be the case.

"No, it's not broken. It's twisted. Twisted and crippled. He won't be able to walk anymore," Annie amends.

What are you even supposed to say to that? It's clear that Annie knew exactly what she was doing when she did it. And her father had laughed with glee while praising her 'graduation' like this is some kind of a sick...

Carla closes her eyes and forces herself to take a deep breath. It won't do to lose her cool. She's the adult in this situation. She needs to-

"You're such a gorilla," Eren says, clicking his tongue.

No, Eren. No. Why would you...? Why is her youngest like this? Just a sprinkle of kindness from Zeke would have done wonders. That's all Carla asks. Just a sprinkle.

But Annie snorts and cracks a smile. "And you need to learn how to talk to girls."

Carla vehemently agrees.

"Did breaking his leg change anything?" Eren asks. "Was it worth it?"

"Don't know," Annie answers.

"Do you regret it?"

Annie shrugs.

Eren seems to think about that for a second. Then he grins. "Then it's not a bad thing."

"H-how do you figure...?" Carla asks, completely caught off-guard by her youngest's line of logic.

"Because when you do something bad, you immediately regret it. But if Annie doesn't know whether she regrets it, then it's not a bad thing at all."

Carla wants to point out that no, someone was injured. That's a very bad thing. But is reminding Annie that she did something horrible really a good thing? Yes, Mr. Leonhart is crippled, but how does making Annie feel worse about the situation going to help anyone? Annie has to already live with what has happened for the rest of her life. Even if it's just for a short while, is offering her respite really that bad of a thing?

"Besides, this means that you're now officially the strongest person in all of Liberio interment zone!" With a delighted laugh, Eren holds his hand out for Annie to take. "Let's make a cake celebrate!"

Is it really okay for Carla to let them "celebrate" when Mr. Leonhart is suffering?

But the minute she sees Annie smile and take Eren's hand, it becomes impossible for her to protest.

"Before we start, you two need to wash your hands," she tells them instead.

*

Annie's guess is correct. Mr. Leonhart will need a crutch to walk around for the rest of his life. But he looked rather proud of the whole ordeal that it's clearly making Grisha uncomfortable. Carla squeezes his shoulder as a sign of solidarity, but that's about all she can do for him right now.

When Mr. Leonhart sees the cake, he bursts out laughing. "That's right! The best way to celebrate is with a cake!"

His laughter still has a ring of hysteria to it. But Annie seems more interested in fighting with Eren for the piece with the most amount of blueberries on it, so Carla thinks the cake was a great idea.

*

You know when a mission was particularly bad when the general hospital calls for Grisha and Grandpa for help. When Zeke and Eren return from missions like those, they are quiet and downcast. Carla knows it's forbidden for them to talk about what happened during their missions, but she desperately wishes there was something more she can do to help them. They must have seen something horrible, right? They must have gone through something so awful, and Carla will never be able to understand.

Grandma listens to Carla's concerns carefully, a soft smile on her face.

"It is hard, isn't it?" she says. "But it is our duty as those waiting at home to not let that show. And instead, we should provide a safe place for them to come back to."

"How do we do that?" Carla asks.

With a smile, Grandma motions for Carla to watch and learn. Then she turns to their two boys in the living room.

"Alright! Now that our two strongest are back home, it's time to rearrange the furniture!"

Eren groans. "But it's fine how it is, isn't it?"

"Nope," Grandma insists, shaking her head. "Now that the days are getting longer, we need to move the furniture so that we receive the maximum amount of sunlight. It's for the patients."

"If it's for the patients, we can't refuse," Zeke decides.

Seeing his brother agree to it, Eren reluctantly agrees.

Carla knows this tactic. She had this exact thing used against her when her sons go off to missions. It seems Grandma has picked up that Carla knows what she's doing, because Carla receives a wink in response.

Grandma sets them all off to work, even Carla. There's no time to think about anything unnecessary when they're all busy trying to figure out how best to get the most amount of sunlight into the clinic.

*

The look of desperation is the first thing that Carla notes. Then and only then does she realize who the man, the pregnant woman, and a small child about Eren's age standing before the clinic door are.

"... The Grices, right?" she asks.

Mr. Grice looks stricken at being recognized. With trembling hands and face so pale, he pleads with Carla.

"Please. M-my wife... The hospital and everyone else laughed us out. B-b-but the baby..."

There's not a single person in the interment zone that wouldn't know who the Grices are. How could they not after the grand showing of public humiliation the Marleys put this family through for their betrayal? And unlike the Jaeger family, who had Zeke as the proof of their loyalty to Marley, the Grices didn't have such luxury.

But to laugh someone in need of help out of the hospital just because of that is beyond cruel.

"Even if the rest of the family doesn't agree, I will help," Carla promises.

"Mom, dad wanted..." Eren pauses at the sight of the people. "Why are all of you out here? Come in. There's more than enough room."

Although Carla knows it's because Eren doesn't know who these people are that he can say that, she feels nothing but thankful for her youngest.

Carla moves to help the pregnant lady. "Let's go in."

*

"Carla, I've been looking for..." Grisha trails off, probably at the sight of the Grices.

There are a thousand and one thoughts that race through Carla's mind, but every single one of them leave dread and fear in the pit of her stomach. Grisha is going to be angry. He's going to kick them out. After all, it was a Grice that was involved with Dina and the Eldian Restorationists that eventually turned Grisha into a widow. 

But after all that's happened, Carla cannot turn her back to these people. Not only because they need help but also because of who they are.

Because she was also a member of the Eldian Restorationists.

"Dad, if you're not going to help, then don't block the way!" Eren snaps.

Grisha snaps out of his thoughts and nods. "R-right. I'll help. There's an empty bed by the corner that we can use."

*

Both Eren and Zeke help out often in the clinic enough to know what to do for childbirth. And with Grisha calmly taking the lead, the stress of the situation disappears within seconds.

The sound of a baby crying fills the clinic.

And Grisha sits down with Mr. Grice to talk about the past. Carla doesn't think it is appropriate for her to eavesdrop, so she lets the two be. Instead, she peeks in on her two boys. They're with the mother and her newly born baby, and the kid who has just become the older brother.

"This sure takes me back," Zeke says with a small chuckle. "When Eren was born, he was that tiny, too. Colt, you were calm when you were helping us. So I'm sure you'll be a good big brother."

The kid flusters and beams all at once. But Eren seems to be annoyed by his brother's comment.

"I'd be a good big brother, too!" Eren insists.

Zeke pretends to think for a second before he shakes his head and puts his arms around Eren. "I don't think so. You're best as my cute little brother, Eren!"

Eren pouts at Zeke, clearly annoyed. But Carla misses whatever else might have been said because Mrs. Grice notices her.

"Oh, Mrs. Jaeger! Thank you so much for taking us in! Please, come close and look at baby Falco. Without your help, he wouldn't have been born this healthy."

That's too much of a praise. Carla really didn't do anything that fancy. Besides, this is the least she can do, especially since this family went through the worst possible outcome, even though the Jaegers' circumstances were so similar. But Carla doesn't put down the good mood and comes over to look at the sweet baby.

"Falco, you said? What a cutie," Carla says.

Eren tugs on Carla's shirt. "Mom! Mom! I would be an awesome big brother, right?"

Carla has no doubts of that. How can Eren be anything but a great big brother when he has Zeke as his role model? The problem isn't that. The problem is the simple fact that Carla's heart will not be able to take losing yet another child to the Marleys.

"I think Zeke is right. You're the cutest as the little brother," Carla tells him.

Eren pouts. "I would be an awesome big brother!"

"Then why don't you be a big brother to Falco here?" Carla suggests.

Immediately, Eren brightens. Heh. He's so easy that she can't help but to find it adorable. Eren peers at the little baby and then up at Mrs. Grice.

"W-would it be alright?"

"B-but I'm the big brother!" Colt exclaims in shock.

"A-and our family is..." Mrs. Grice pauses here with a guilty look. "It probably is for Eren's best that he-"

Carla squeezes her shoulder. "What do you mean? We run a clinic. Anyone that needs help, we will help."

There's nothing but guilt in her heart at the sight of grateful tears on Mrs. Grice's face.

"Then both of you, please take good care of Falco together," Carla says, trying to distract herself from this feeling.

"I'll be a better big brother," Eren brags to the baby.

"Nuh-uh! I will!" Colt counters, looking a second away from tears.

Zeke laughs and ruffles their hairs. "Then the first thing you two need to do is quiet down. We don't want to scare Falco and make him cry."

*

The Grice family stays at the clinic for few more days afterwards. Grisha (and everyone) insists that they can stay longer, but they claim that they don't want to make others uncomfortable.

But Colt does drop by from time to time. He claims it's to show Eren how much better of a big brother he is comparatively. But Carla is sure it's because he's lonely.

"Who's this?" Annie asks, her voice cold.

Colt freezes at the sight of the glare that Annie is leveling him. Carla doesn't blame him. She thought it was pretty scary to see at first, too. But the bigger worry is whether Eren will set fire on Colt and make it so that he never returns or if he'll be a decent human today.

Eren scowls. "My bitter rival. We're fighting over Falco's custody."

"Who's Falco?" Annie demands.

"My little brother," Colt says seriously. "And it's a losing fight. I've already won."

Annie nods seriously. "If it's Colt's little brother, you've lost before you've begun. Eren, you will never be a big brother."

Oh no. The one to put the nail in the coffin is Annie! Carla watches in morbid fascination as Eren lets out a startled shout.

"W-what does that mean?! Of course, I can be a big brother!"

"You can't," Annie insists. "You aren't blood family."

Eren rolls his eyes. "Who cares about that? By that logic, Zeke and I aren't family either."

Carla freezes. It's not quite that she was hiding Dina from Eren or anything. But she didn't think Eren realized that he and Zeke had different mothers.

"You two aren't blood family?" Annie asks, shocked.

Colt looks just as shocked.

"Yeah. Zeke's adopted."

Carla blinks. Uh...? Huh? Eren, what are you saying...???

"He's the only blonde in the entire family. It's not that hard to figure out."

W-while that is true, that isn't correct in the slightest!

"So you can be family with people who aren't blood-related," Eren concludes.

T-that is a very good conclusion to draw, yes. But Eren, Zeke is most definitely related to you!

"You... can be family..." Annie mumbles. She seems lost in thought for a bit before she nods. "Okay. Then I'll also fight to adopt Falco."

Colt stares at the two of them in disbelief. "I don't like either of you!"

But Colt returns a few days later to play. So it's a bit hard to take him at his word.

More importantly, Carla really needs to sit Eren down and talk to him about their family!

*

Eren is seven years old when it is decided that he will inherit the Armored Titan. Zeke will be receiving the Beast Titan. Along with this announcement is the news that all those who receive a titan will only have 13 years left to live. Their "term," to be precise.

"But both your sons have been chosen to inherit titans. That's more than someone like me can say," Mrs. Braun says lightly.

Carla wonders if she sounds like she's trying to humble brag, because that look on Mrs. Braun's face seems to accuse her of so. Especially to Mrs. Braun, whose son has been skipped over completely, it probably is grating to hear something like this from Carla.

"It just means that Reiner has more time to prepare himself. Like Porco," Mrs. Galliard points out with a sweet smile.

If Carla was to say something like that, she has no doubts that it wouldn't have gone over well. Ah, whatever. It's not really her business to watch out for Mrs. Braun's feelings.

"Still, it is a bit nerve wracking," Mrs. Hoover admits softly. "They never said before anything about a 13 years time limit."

Okay, so Carla isn't alone in feeling like this, right? "Honor" or not, it's the lives of their children that will be given up. And that's not even mentioning the blood that will be on their hands as the "proud" weapons of Marley. Is this really worth the "Honorary Marleyan" title? They're essentially trading their kids for a title that doesn't mean anything. Eren will die at the young age of 20. Carla was part of the Restorationists, stealing information from Marley for Owl at that age. What do you mean she's going to far outlive her youngest?

"Even so, our children will be the pride and joy of Marley. This is the perfect step forward to bridge the gap between ourselves and other Marleyans!" Mrs. Braun says.

Carla wonders if she's a bad person for finding those words too optimistic.

"Bridge the gap, huh?" Mrs. Galliard mumbles.

"But... our children will..." Mrs. Hoover can't seem to continue after that.

Mrs. Braun shakes her head at them. "What's wrong with all of you? Isn't this the chance that we've all been waiting for? Why did you allow your children to take the Warrior Candidacy Exam if not to show your dedication and loyalty to the Marleyan cause? Or are you saying that your loyalty is conditional?"

It's the exact accusation Carla feared. If they push the topic anymore now, it'll go straight into danger territory that will get her family into trouble. She'll just douse it for now and change the topic.

"Of course not. How can you doubt any of our loyalty? We're all in the same boat," Carla says with a gentle smile. "Oh, that said, Mrs. Hoover, Bertolt's been hanging out with Eren recently. Is he okay? My youngest have a bad habit of being a bit too rough with his plays..."

Mrs. Hoover looks relieved at the conversation change. She smiles. "It's the happiest I've seen him in a while. He took after his dad when it comes to being shy, so I feared he won't be able to make friends. Thank Eren for me, please?"

"I will!"

With that, it becomes much easier to talk about other mindless gossip than questions of their loyalties.

*

Neither Eren nor Zeke seem any different when they return after inheriting their respective titans. They are forbidden from telling her how they inherited the powers or to show off their powers. But that doesn't stop Eren.

"Watch this!" he says with the largest kitchen knife in hand.

Carla's mind goes blank at the sight of the knife. Don't get her wrong, she's used to Eren using it in the kitchen to help out, especially on nights when Zeke and Eren are cooking. But it's a completely different story to see her youngest lift the knife and drop it down on his finger.

She's not the only one who shouted in shock.

Grandpa runs forward to try and stop the bleeding while Grisha takes the knife out of Eren's hand. Carla and Zeke both grab Grandma before she collapses to the ground, clutching her heart. Faintly, she's aware of everyone yelling something or another. Quite possibly because of the sudden uproar, Eren looks just as shocked as they all do.

"What?" he dares demand.

"Commander Magath told you not to-"

"You can't do things like that!"

"Your finger, Eren! Your finger!"

"-were you thinking?!"

Eren yanks his hand back from Grandpa to show all of them. "Look! It grows back! Isn't that cool?"

They have a long talk afterwards about appropriate behaviors when handling knives at home.

*

Carla wasn't aware that Mrs. Braun had siblings. But she must have, since she and Reiner are both here at the clinic along with Mr. and Mrs. Braun. Seeing that, Carla supposes she should refer to Reiner's mom as "Karina."

"Thank you for having us," Mrs. Braun says. "We tried to ask the general hospital, but they said they were full this week. On top of that, they said pregnancies are something that can easily be taken care of with a nursemaid. But we just... It's our first child. And we're just-"

"Don't worry about it. We'll give you the best care," Grandma assures her.

Reiner glances around, seeming disappointed. Did he want to play with Eren?

"If you're looking for Eren, he went out with Annie to play," Carla says.

Reiner's cheeks flush red. "I-I wasn't looking for him! I just thought it was nice and quiet because he wasn't here!"

How cute. But no wonder Eren gets so easily fed up with Reiner. Eren is bad at reading between the lines and assumes that everyone will be honest with him as Zeke is. He doubtlessly takes Reiner's harsh words to heart every time.

"I'm sure if you run, you'd be able to catch up to them," Carla says.

There's a small pause before Reiner meekly asks, "Which way did they go? N-not because I want to go. B-but... i-if I know, I'd be able to dodge them."

How cute.

"It's probably not my place to say this, but, Reiner, Eren is really bad at reading people's true feelings. If you don't honestly let your feelings show from time to time, he's not going to understand you."

She wonders if maybe she's meddling too much with this. But if they can, she would really like for them to be friends. With her mind made up, she tells Reiner the direction Annie and Eren left in. Reiner nods seriously and takes his leave.

"You're quite hands-on with your boy, aren't you?" Karina asks lightly.

Carla didn't realize that someone was listening in. But it's not like she said or did anything that could be considered traitorous. There's no need for her to feel uneasy, even if she does.

"Eren has a bad habit of being too wild if I'm not," Carla says, keeping her voice equally light.

Karina smiles, but it doesn't reach her eyes. "He sounds like a handful."

"He is. But I wouldn't have it any other way."

A brief silence settles between the two of them. Carla would have been fine citing needing to help out at the clinic as a reason to cut this conversation here. But Karina speaks up.

"You must be very happy to have snatched this place and your husband from his previous wife. After all, you don't have to go outside the interment zone for a job anymore."

For a frightful second, Carla fears that Karina knows about what Carla has done. Then Karina continues speaking.

"Oh, please don't look so surprised. It's a common knowledge in the interment zone. The Grice family and the Jaeger family both had family members that betrayed Marley. But the Jaegers had Zeke to vouch for their loyalty. Lucky for you to find such a wonderful family!"

Carla finds herself relaxing immediately. Karina doesn't know anything. Just like everyone else, they assume Carla is a hussy that moved in once she saw a chance in a place that would be more profitable than her previous job.

That's good.

It means that she's being underestimated. And those that think themselves so much grander than what's around them are the easiest kind of prey. Still, Carla supposes Karina is rather ballsy to challenge the best informant Owl had.

"Indeed! I'm very lucky. Likewise, you're lucky, too. If it wasn't for Zeke, your brother's wife wouldn't be able to have her first child in a safe environment like a clinic! After all, not even a Warrior Candidate armband could buy you a place in the general hospital," Carla says brightly.

Karina's expression sours.

It makes Carla smile sweetly. She always loves putting people back in their place when they get too big of a head. It's not something she was allowed to do while working outside the interment zone in the Marleyan side of Liberio. But that's not the case any more.

"Let's not make enemies of each other," Carla continues. "I do so hate bullying the less fortunate."

They drop the conversation there.

*

Mrs. Braun goes into labor two days later. A cute little girl by the name of Gabi joins her family.

Eren doesn't hesitate to declare that he will be adopting Gabi as his little sister, because he is certain that he will be a better big brother than Reiner ever will be. It prompts a bit of a small fight between Reiner and him (and later Annie, who claimed that as girls, it made the most amount of sense for her to be Gabi's big sister. Eren responded to this by reminding Annie that she had no female influence in her life, so who is she trying to kid? And Carla hasn't seen Annie's martial art moves in action before, but now she understands how Annie was able to destroy her father's leg). But it's nothing that Carla can't deal with.

"I doubt little Gabi would want siblings who can't even clean after themselves."

Immediately, all three of them volunteer to clean around the clinic. They're all such charming kids. Carla hopes that they never grow out of this.

*

Eren's group of friends is obvious. His closest friend is Annie, no questions asked. The Galliards seem the closest to Eren after Annie (even if Eren complains a lot about them and seems to scowl more often than not when they're near). Carla isn't too sure where Bertolt falls. Eren is often dragging Bertolt around (and when Eren isn't, Bertolt hurriedly follows after him as if terrified of getting separated), which she feels says quite a lot about Eren's ability to go along with things once they've been set in place. Colt and Eren are on friendly enough terms, but it always feels like Colt doesn't want to take the next step to become closer.

The only one Carla isn't sure about is Reiner.

"I don't like him. He's really obnoxious."

Carla recalls how Karina was. If Reiner is subjected to that kind of treatment at home, then it's really no wonder that Eren would find Reiner obnoxious.

"Eren, I think Reiner might be under some pressure at home. I'm sure he'd appreciate it if you guys invited him out."

By that, Carla really means that try and get that poor kid away from home and away from Karina.

"But why do I have to, just because he's 'pressured' from home? He's a pain to be around. If he wants to be invited to things, he should be nicer."

"But Eren, you're a brat, and people still invite you out to things!" Carla points out, knowing it'll rile up her youngest.

As expected, Eren pouts at her. "Mom! That's not the same!"

"How is it not the same?"

"Because I'm cute!"

Carla bets that Eren used that line on Zeke and it worked before. Otherwise, he wouldn't look so triumphantly at her. But if he thinks for a second that such an adorable tactic would work against the person who gave birth to him, then he is terribly mistaken.

"Bratty kids aren't cute at all. They're obnoxious," Carla declares.

Eren looks like he has nothing to say to that. He throws his arms in the air with a scowl.

"Fine! Fine! I'll invite him! Just don't expect much, though. He's really rude."

Carla laughs and ruffles Eren's hair. "What do you know? You are the cutest."

It's clear that Eren wants to beam at the praise, but he also wants to keep the scowl on his face. He looks so cute when he can't decide how to express himself.

If only he could stay this innocent forever.

*

If there's just one thing that Carla is grateful for about these titan abilities, it's that Zeke and Eren always return from missions without a single scratch on them. Even though there's a line of injured at the general hospital, neither Zeke nor Eren have a single injury.

Perhaps because of that, the two are eager to help out at the clinic when the hospital overfills and needs them to take on the less critically injured.

"Eren, take these," Grandpa says, tossing bloodied bedsheets and towels towards him.

Without any complains, Eren takes them in his arms and goes off running to Grandma's side by to do the laundry.

"Dad, the patient by the window said his leg feels like it's on fire. What should I do?" Zeke asks.

Grisha thinks about it for a second. "Zeke, finish wrapping this person's bandages for them. I'll go to him."

Carla checks up on other patients with a basket of clean towels and sheets. If anyone looks like they're in a critical situation, Carla quickly gets Grandpa or Grisha to come. Otherwise, she can only offer soft words of well-wishes as she passes clean towels and sheets over.

She wishes that there was a little more that she could do. But she has never received formal training to be a doctor or a nurse. Even if she feels like she knows what to do, she would rather not risk someone's life on a whim.

Typically, this roar of activity dies down after a week. This kind of activity, by the way, isn't the norm for when Eren and Zeke returns from missions, either. It's only in extreme cases (signified by how long a mission drags on). For the most part, it's just Grandpa and Grisha being called to the general hospital, if that.

By the time things calm down here, majority of the patients can be moved to the general hospital until they're well enough to return home, if they haven't already been discharged. It's only once they hit that point that Carla can finally ask Eren and Zeke how their mission went.

"We can't tell you the details. But it was gruesome," Zeke says.

Eren nods. "It wouldn't have been that bad if they just let me go-"

"We talked about this. Eren, we can't just drop the Warriors in first thing. We need to first figure out the enemy's positions and-"

"Blah blah blah!" Eren says, interrupting his brother with a scowl. "What's the point of having an impenetrable armor if it can't even be used to protect everyone?"

"Because one day, that armor isn't going to be so impenetrable. Whether it be because you overused it or because our enemy figured out a new weapon," Zeke points out.

"Then drop Bertolt! No new weapon will be able to stand that kind of an explosive heat."

Zeke grabs Eren by the shoulders. "And if Bertolt happened to be in a bad mood that he can't transform? Or if he is found and injured before he can? Eren, we go out of our way to find safe places and timing so that those situations will never arise. Things won't always go smoothly. Over-reliance on your titan abilities will be your downfall."

It's the firmest Carla has ever seen Zeke be with Eren. And from the way Eren angrily grumbles to himself but doesn't challenge Zeke anymore, she gets the feeling this is an age-old argument between the two of them.

So they're now at the age where they can clearly talk to each other about their sides of the argument without making snide remarks about unrelated things, huh?

Carla feels proud but also a little sad.

*

Eren is eight when Zeke brings home a girl.

Now it should be mentioned that unlike Eren who is often followed home by his friends, Zeke very rarely brings anyone home. Zeke insists that it's because he and his friends find hanging out at a clinic to be awkward (Carla agrees), but Eren says it's because Zeke has no friends (Eren, please stop saying those things to Zeke's face).

The young girl introduces herself as Pieck. Carla estimates her to be closer to Eren's age than Zeke's. But what catches Carla's eyes is the armband that marks her as a Warrior. Immediately, she recalls the mysterious Pieck that she has yet to meet and her situation with her sick father in the general hospital.

"Please do excuse me," she says politely. "I was curious about the clinic and asked Zeke to bring me."

"It's not a problem at all. Shall I give you a tour?" Carla offers.

"That's alright. I got it," Zeke tells her.

Carla figures it'll be for the best to back off and let the two take care of things. But that doesn't mean she's not going to watch over them.

"Your family seems sweet," Pieck tells Zeke lightly.

"That's right. They are. And that's exactly the reason why you'll stay away from them."

It surprises Carla because she's not used to hearing any kind of threat come out of Zeke's mouth. He's always so kind and well-mannered. Carla can't recall Zeke ever being this cold to anyone before.

Pieck giggles like they're talking about every day normal things. "How scary! But don't you think it's unfair that you're accusing me even though I haven't done anything?"

"I know you've been reporting to the Commander behind our backs. Normally, I wouldn't care less what you do in your free time. But you've been watching Eren a bit too closely."

"Maybe I have a crush," Pieck says lightly.

"If you were human, I would believe that," Zeke tells her with a sweet smile. Then he pauses for a second before letting out a small sound like he just remembered something. "Oh right. Isn't your dad's surgery coming up? I see. So that's why you've been desperately trying to find dirt to report. I do hope that there aren't any complications with the surgery. That would be unfortunate, since we can't help your dad's case here."

Carla feels a chill. So that's why Zeke never wanted to bring any friends over. It wasn't just that the clinic was an awkward place to hang out (which it is, by the way), but it was because Zeke understood that anyone who wanted to get close to you was doing so for ulterior purposes. How many, Carla wonders, have already approached Zeke since he was little for that very reason? It has to be a lot for Zeke to know exactly how to spot those kinds of people.

"And that's our tour!" Zeke says, purposefully speaking loud enough for anyone trying to eavesdrop. "Lucky for you, you'll never need it since, as a Warrior, you can heal yourself."

Translation: Never come back.

Carla closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. That's right. This is the reality for all Eldians living in the interment zone. Carla was being too naive. Just because these are children doesn't mean that they are completely innocent. They can't. This place won't allow them to be.

The fact that her sons must go out and kill people should have been more than enough hint, shouldn't it?

Carla stops asking Zeke when he'll bring friends over. She also stops pushing Eren to invite others when he goes out to play.

*

When Eren is nine, a patient at the clinic introduces him to chess.

Carla thought that Eren would find it a boring game. Not because she finds it boring (which, okay fine, she does), but because she didn't think Eren would find a game where he sits and thinks for a long period of time interesting. It just goes to show how her youngest can surprise her.

Both Annie and Colt make faces when Eren asks them to play with him. Porco tries to play a round and gets horribly distracted after five minutes. Bertolt can play for a while, but it's clear that he doesn't really know how to play. He's often hanging his head after losing the match. The only one who readily plays and gives Eren a challenge is Marcel. But it's clear that Porco gets jealous if his brother's attention is on something else, because he goes out of his way to ruin their matches.

No surprise, Eren defaults to playing with Zeke and stops bringing up chess to his group of friends. The time typically set aside for their bedtime story seems to have been replaced with chess matches.

"Checkmate," Zeke says, putting his piece down.

Carla waits for the wail of unfairs and demands of Zeke play nicer. But Eren keeps surprising her.

"Ah! That's too cool! I forgot to guard my king because I was distracted with my queen!" Eren laughs. "Zeke, one more match, please?"

Eren's eyes are bright. He's not playing chess for victory. He's playing because he's enjoying watching the game unfold.

Carla feels like her youngest has matured way too fast and feels rather lonely.

*

"Falco! You're here!" Eren swoons at the sight of the two year old. He rushes over and picks up the baby in his arms. "You've grown so big! Did you miss me?"

"Haha! How cute! Zeke, look! Eren's acting just like you did at his age!" Grandpa laughs.

Zeke's face turns red. "I-I wasn't like that!"

"Unhand my little brother!" Colt exclaims, pointing accusingly at Eren.

At the sound of the loud noise, Falco flinches and hides his face in Eren's shirt. Eren gives Colt a smug smirk.

"Falco has spoken. He's my little brother now."

"We better return little Falco before Eren says something more," Grisha says.

Carla stops him. "No, no. Let them play a little more. Eren knows that at the end of the day, Falco will go home with his family."

"Eren did this with Gabi, too," Grandma recalls. "Maybe it's time to consider getting him a little sibling?"

There's no way that Carla would. And from the way Grandma smiles softly and pats Carla's shoulder, Carla understands she gets it, too.

"It's fine! It's fine! Let him adopt little siblings like this. It's better for us, since they go home after they play!" Grandpa points out.

Carla supposes that's sound logic.

*

The timing of Eren's and Zeke's missions vary greatly. Some missions take few hours, and the two are back for dinner as if it's a normal day. Some missions take days. Some weeks. It's rare, but they have had a few missions that took a few months.

But this is new.

"A... m-mission where?"

Is it just her or is it difficult to breath? This is cruel. This is much too cruel. How can anyone look at this and call it a matter of loyalty? They want to send her sons where?

"To Paradis Island. Commander Magath said it'll only take a month if we do our best," Eren says with a grin.

But that's where they drop pure titans. Eren, do you understand where this mission will be taking place? Do you understand what the Marleys are truly asking of you?

"W-what if it takes longer?" Grisha asks. He squeezes Carla's shoulder as if silently sending her his strength.

"Then it stretches on longer. But I doubt that. I mean, we're really good at our job."

But there's a possibility that it could. For an unforeseen amount of time, her sons will be trapped on that island with pure titans and Eldian devils that abandoned the rest of the world.

"They haven't decided on the roster yet, though," Eren adds. "It'll probably be maybe three or four of us."

There's hope, Carla realizes. There's hope that her sons won't be involved in this.

*

The hope is dashed but three days later.

*

Eren is ten when he is picked to be part of the group that will take the Founding Titan from Paradis Island.

No matter what kind of reason or excuse Carla can think of, Grisha shoots them all down with a stricken look on his face. She understands where he's coming from, but she doesn't want to accept it. Being labeled as a traitor is fine. Being sent off to die on that island is fine, because at least that means that she'll be on that island with Eren, right?

And perhaps the reason why she feels this strongly is because Zeke was not chosen to be part of this group.

"T-there has to be a way to stop this," Carla whispers, her head in her hands. "There has to be something we can say. Something we can do."

Grisha doesn't say anything. He wraps his arms around her and sits with her in the kitchen. It's not false hope. It's not berating her for thinking so naively. It's quiet solidarity. And for a hopeless case like this, Carla thinks that that is the only way to properly comfort someone.

"E-Eren is a smart kid. He's resourceful and clever. He'll be able to figure this out."

She sounds like she's trying to convince herself. Grisha's hold around her tightens. It feels like a reminder of the hopeless situation before them. There's absolutely nothing they can do but allow the whims of Marleyans to take their children away.

*

But just because Eren is going away doesn't mean they should spoil him (She doesn't care how fancy the parade was. It doesn't change the fact that she's not letting him be spoiled). That makes it seem too much like they're saying goodbye for good. They should go about the day as they do every day without any deviation. It's the only thing Carla can control in this situation.

"Nope. You don't get extra dessert. Just one."

"Eren, you still have to do your chores."

"And why do you need more than one chess match before bed?"

"Don't leave your dirty clothes lying around!"

Eren pouts. "Aw mom! I leave tomorrow! Can't you just allow one thing?"

Carla pretends to think. "Alright. Then I'll let you have just one extra slice of pie for dessert."

Eren straightens and beams. Well, she supposes this little should be okay. He's so cute grinning like that, so it should be fine.

Everything will be fine, right?

*

She is being ridiculously overprotective.

There is no need to do this. Logically speaking, she understands that. Especially as the one who said to not spoil Eren, she knows that this will come across as hypocritical. But she can't seem to relax without doing it.

Hoping that her youngest is asleep, she opens his bedroom door.

Her heart freezes.

Because Eren isn't in here.

Immediately, her eyes go towards the window. Locked. There's no way that Eren left through the window. She doesn't recall hearing the front door open. So he must still be at home, right? But... to be honest, even if he decided to leave so that he doesn't have to go on the Paradis Mission, Carla wouldn't fault him at all. Sure, it'll probably trouble the family. Sure, it'll end up being tense at home for a while. But if she can protect Eren just this much...

She needs to look for Eren.

The most likely place is the bathroom, then the kitchen, and...

Wait.

Carla quietly opens the door to Zeke's room.

There.

On bed with the blanket thrown around them, her sons are sleeping soundly.

She finds herself breathing out slowly in relief. Of course, she thinks to herself. It is the last night before Eren goes off on a long mission. She can allow them this peace of mind.

Just as quietly as when she opened the door, she closes it and lets them be.

*

They are not allow to leave the interment zone, even if it's to say goodbye at the harbor. All of their farewells must be said here at the gates. Even the other Warrior Candidates who are typically allowed to leave have been told to stay inside.

Carla has already told Eren all that she wanted to say before they left the clinic, of course. Otherwise, her words would seem too much like betrayal to the Marleyan cause. But that doesn't mean that she's completely out of things to say.

"You have to watch out, okay? Zeke won't be there to have your back," Carla says.

Eren groans and rolls his eyes. "Mom, you've said that a thousand times!"

"And I'll say it a thousand more, if it means you'll listen!"

The Marleyans have decided on three Warrior Candidates to go on this mission. Eren Jaeger, Bertolt Hoover, and Marcel Galliard.

The three boys look even smaller next to the Marleyan soldiers leading them out of the interment zone and towards the harbor.

"You'll be careful, right?" Carla asks in desperation one last time.

Eren sighs. "Mom! It's just for a month!"

"You have to come back home," Grisha says.

Eren gives the two of them a stink eye. Then he lets out a soft sigh and gives all of them a lopsided grin.

"Be good and don't cry, okay?"

Carla misses him already.

*

"Oh, no! His monkey!" Carla exclaims in shock when she finds Eren's most precious monkey doll on the kitchen table (Most precious, she suspects, because Grandpa mentioned in passing that this used to be Zeke's favorite toy). "W-we need to get this to him right now. Can they turn the ship around? They'll just have to-"

"Carla, deep breaths," Grandma says, rubbing Carla's back.

"I told him to leave that behind. It would be bad if he lost it while he was on that island." Zeke gives Carla an apologetic look.

Right. Right. Of course. That makes perfect sense. Carla clutches the doll close to her heart. She is overreacting. She is being unreasonable. She really needs to take a deep breath and calm down.

"Eren is going to be fine," Grisha assures her with a smile.

Grandpa nods in agreement. "It is our Eren, after all. He's resourceful and clever. He'll be back to hold his doll in no time."

Right. That's how Eren is. There's no need to worry. Eren will be back soon.

It's just one month.

*

The first few days aren't too bad.

She just treats it like she normally would when Eren and Zeke both go off on missions. Sure, seeing Zeke at home is throwing her off a bit, but for the most part, she's doing fine. She just focuses on the things that are required of her as someone who works at a clinic. And boy, does that really take her mind off of worrying about her youngest.

There's a bulletin board they have up in the clinic area with the community news, cards from patients, drawings Zeke and Eren did when they were younger, and a calendar. Carla has been marking that calendar, counting down the days.

It's only a matter of time before Eren comes home.

*

Annie stops by at the one week mark, bringing with her a basket of apples.

"We had a lot," is her excuse. But Carla is pretty sure she's here to check in on them.

"Maybe we should make apple pie since we have so much," Grandma suggests.

Annie straightens. "May I help?"

Or maybe it's that Annie missed eating over. It didn't seem like Mr. Leonhart knew how to cook that well... Oh, the poor dear! No wonder she was always over!

"You know that you can come over whenever you want, right?" Carla asks. "You don't have to bring anything with you either. If you just miss us or want to eat something delicious, please feel free to come over."

The look of hesitation tells Carla all she needs to know. She supposes she can't blame Annie. It must be weird since Eren isn't around. So Carla gives her a soft smile and squeezes Annie's shoulder.

"It's too quiet around here. So we'd really appreciate it if you could. Only if you want to, of course."

"Wouldn't... I be a bother?" Annie asks, lowering her head.

Carla gently pats her head. "Of course not. You're family, Annie."

When Annie looks up, her eyes are bright and filled with hope. Carla thinks she might have said something important to Annie without realizing it. But since Annie doesn't look offended, Carla is going to let it go with that.

*

It seems that the Marleyans have no plans on pausing their conquests while waiting for Eren, Marcel, and Bertolt to return from their mission. The official reason given is that they don't want their enemies to realize what they're up to. But Carla is pretty sure it's because their own attention span is so short that they cannot fathom the thought of waiting one month.

Zeke leaves for a week for his own mission.

"It's so quiet without the kids," Grandpa remarks.

"It'll be noisy enough once Zeke returns from the mission with all the injured," Grisha reminds him.

The two sigh.

Carla gives the two of them a look with her hands on her hips. "What about instead of bemoaning, you two help out with cleaning?"

"Oh, would you look at that? It's time for Mr. Hiddles' medicine!" Grandpa exclaims, standing up to run for his patient.

"I-I just recalled that-"

Carla continues to give Grisha a look. After a second of stuttering, Grisha hangs his head.

"Okay. I'll clean. What do you need me to do?"

Later, Grandma gives Carla a pat on the back. "You're becoming a great housewife, putting your husband to good use!"

*

As predicted, Zeke returns with a long line of injured. Those with lighter injuries are sent to the clinic. This time around, Carla finds both Porco and Reiner.

"Porco!"

Mrs. Galliard relaxes considerably when she spots her son with just a light sprain. Carla doesn't blame her.

"S-sorry, mom," Porco mumbles. "I tried really hard not to get hurt, though."

"I can forgive this much," Mrs. Galliard assures him.

But on the other hand, Karina still hasn't come to look for Reiner. It's probably because she's busy at work. If Carla doesn't think of it like that, she would feel too sad for Reiner.

*

The Galliards return few days later with a basket of various fruits and vegetables as a thank you, even though Carla tells them that it's fine. Porco leaves with them with a clean bill of health.

If anything, it's Reiner that Carla can't help but to worry over. None of the Brauns have stopped by.

"I'll just walk home," Reiner says.

He looks downcast. It was probably made worse because he saw how Porco's family reacted. For just a second, Carla considers getting involved. But it's really not her business.

She has her hands full worrying over her sons. She cannot worry about the Braun's family situation on top of that.

*

Sometimes, Mrs. Hoover comes over with baked goods and a nervous smile on her face. Carla understands the unspoken feelings and always welcome her with open arms. It's become a bit of a thing now to have tea together in the afternoon every few days.

For the first time, Mrs. Galliard joins them for afternoon tea.

"It's a bit nerve wracking, waiting," Mrs. Hoover admits softly.

Carla finds herself chuckling. "I hear you. It's hard, isn't it?"

"I've been counting down the days myself," Mrs. Galliard says, motioning at the calendar on the bulletin board. "There's only a week left, so we have to be strong."

"I can't wait to see Eren again!" Carla says.

Mrs. Hoover smiles. "I-if it's not too much trouble... er... t-that is... I..."

"Would it be alright if we do this even after they return?" Mrs. Galliard asks with a soft smile.

Mrs. Hoover beams.

"Of course! I'd love that!" Carla assures them.

*

Zeke returns with his lips drawn into a tight line, and that tells all of them enough about what happened.

It's been one month since Eren left on the Paradis Mission. The ship to pick him, Bertolt, and Marcel should have returned today. Should have, being the key word.

"They waited for one day," Zeke seethes once it's just the Jaeger family. "And then claimed that it would cost too much fuel to wait any longer and left."

"W-when are they planning on going back?" Grisha asks.

"Another month."

The words "that's not fair" almost leaves Carla's mouth. Of course, it's not fair. They're dealing with Marleyans. What did she expect?

She forces herself to take a deep breath. "That's okay. Eren is smart. He's resourceful and clever. On top of that, he has Bertolt and Marcel with him. They will come back next month."

*

But when the next month comes crawling around, their word changes to wait another three.

Carla understands that she is never going to see her youngest again and stops keeping track of the days.

*

She hears a sound coming from Eren's room and startles. For just a hopeful second, she fools herself into believing that Eren is back. That despite everything, he somehow managed to cross the ocean by himself and crawl into bed.

When she quietly opens the door, she hears Zeke's muffled sobs as he clutches tightly to the monkey doll on Eren's bed.

Carla quietly closes the door and pretends she didn't see anything.

*

Around the sixth month mark, Mrs. Hoover bursts into tears during their afternoon tea.

"I shouldn't have let him become a Warrior," she whispers, her voice hoarse.

Carla can't find the words to comfort her. The best she can do is put a hand on Mrs. Hoover's shoulder and pull her into a half-hug.

"I-it's okay. Marcel is smart. I'm sure he'll bring them all home," Mrs. Galliard says.

But her voice shakes with effort. It's clear that she herself doesn't believe those words.

The three of them can't bring themselves to hope anymore.

*

Marley puts on plenty of show, pretending like they'll bring Eren, Marcel, and Bertolt back from Paradis. But they never do.

Carla is pretty sure everyone believes those three to be dead.

She can't even muster up the feelings of resentment. She just feels tired.

*

At the one year mark, Carla puts Eren's photo next to Faye's.

And Zeke flips out.

"He's not dead!" he shouts, ripping the photo down. "He's not dead! He's not!"

Carla can't do anything but apologize.

"He will come back. I will pick him up myself. We just need to wait."

She wonders how he can be so hopeful.

*

Both Gabi and Falco are starting to grow taller and adventurous.

Sometimes, she hears Eren's laughter when they're over to play. Sometimes, she sees a flash of Eren running around the house. Sometimes, she feels like she smells the dirt and grass on Eren when he returns from playing outside.

Sometimes, she wonders if maybe this is punishment for what she has done. She was too happy. So her happiness was robbed, just like she robbed Dina's happiness.

*

Mrs. Hoover comes to their afternoon teas less and less until she stops coming altogether.

Carla can't find the energy to go after her.

Besides, what will she say that won't sound insulting? What can she possibly offer that won't come across as mocking?

Mrs. Galliard still makes the time to come have tea with Carla, though. Their discussions are always kept light and to the gossips of what's happening around the interment zone. It's not much, but Carla is grateful for the short respites.

*

Annie cuts her hair short one day, surprising all of them.

"I just felt like it was time to change," is all she'll say on the topic.

But she stops staring at Eren's empty room, so Carla thinks she understands what Annie has decided to change.

*

Marley's war efforts become explosive with the declaration of war from the Mid-East Allied Forces. While their Warriors are forced to leave to fight in this war, the Marleys open up the Warrior Candidacy Exams again.

This time, they don't limit it to age groups.

Carla feels sick to her stomach when she hears that Colt, Falco, and Gabi have all been accepted to be Warrior Candidates.

*

The news comes as a shock to her as everyone else, she imagines. At the very least, it caused even Mrs. Hoover to come out of her shell to talk with Carla and Mrs. Galliard for afternoon tea.

"They said they'll go to Paradis," Mrs. Hoover chokes out, her voice barely above a whisper.

Carla recalls Zeke's promise that he will bring Eren home himself. She wonders how much people he killed, how many boots he licked, in order to receive this chance. How does he manage to still hold onto hope when Carla has long given up?

"D-do you think... do you think they'll bring our sons home?"

To say "Of course!" as an answer seems too irresponsible. But to completely crush the hope in Mrs. Hoover's eyes seem too cruel.

Carla settles for "I hope so."

But she doesn't believe her own words.

*

Colt comes over with his eyes bright and a giant grin on his face. Little Falco is by his brother's side, looking a bit confused but also determined.

"I'm here to clean," Colt declares.

"C-clean?" Grandma asks. "What are you going to clean?"

"Eren's room."

They don't have the heart to tell him that they've always cleaned Eren's room. So they let the Grice brothers in with cleaning supplies.

"Erm... w-who's Eren?" Falco asks Carla quietly while his big brother is busy wiping down any sign of dust.

Carla's breath gets caught in her chest. She can't quite remember how to breath. She tries to open her mouth to speak, but no words leave it.

Falco seems to have realized that was the wrong thing to say. He nervously apologies. And no, no. What is she doing? He's just a kid. Of course, he won't remember Eren.

"Eren's your other big brother," Colt answers, surprising Carla.

"I have another big brother?" Falco asks. He moves to his brother's side, clearly interested in this.

"Yup. Just like Annie's your big sister."

Falco lets out a soft "Oh!" in understanding. "And he's coming home!"

"Yeah," Colt says, smiling softly. "Eren's finally coming home."

Carla watches as Falco and Colt both work excitedly to clean the already clean room. She's certain that this feeling in her heart is heartbreak.

*

There's a buzz in the air that's starting to make Carla feel nervous.

When the Marleyans gave the announcement to gather by the gates of the interment zone, Carla assumed it was to cheer for the Warriors for returning from their war efforts. She has already prepared herself for the mess that Zeke will be from returning empty-handed. After all, while everyone else has more or less prepared themselves with the fact that Eren is gone, Zeke physically went to that island to check for himself.

The gates to the interment zone opens. Zeke, Pieck, and Annie walks in with a teenager with long dark-colored hair. A bit behind them are the line of injured that accompany every mission's end.

But there's something odd about this picture, isn't there?

Someone once said that no matter how many years pass without seeing your child, a mother will always be able to recognize their child. Carla knows without a doubt that that's a lie. A "mother's instinct?" Don't be stupid. Those kinds of things only exist in fiction.

But she can't stop her heart from racing. She can't stop that flicker of hope once it's been lit. Her knees feel weak. Grisha reaches over and holds her steady.

The teen pauses and glances around at the people gathered.

And oh.

What defeated green eyes.

What hopeless green eyes.

What desolate green eyes that have seen too much, lost too much.

Slowly, the teen opens his mouth. He hesitates for a second then manages out a meek, "I'm sorry."

With a choking sob, the teen lowers his head.

"I'm... sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I'm the only one who made it back."

Carla doesn't know when her knees gained enough strength for her to stand, let alone run. But before she knows it, she finds herself throwing her arms around the teen.

"Thank you," she finds herself saying as the tears begin to fall freely from her eyes. "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much for coming home, Eren."

_Fin._

**Author's Note:**

> This world is cruel.
> 
> It's something that Carla's always known since her days in the orphanage. It's something that she prepared herself for when she started working outside of the interment zone and met Owl and the rest of the Restorationists. It's something that she felt deeply in her bones when she fell head over heels for Grisha, only to find out that he's a married man with a child on the way. It's something she understood when five years passed without any sign of her youngest returning home.
> 
> But it turns out that the world can also be beautiful.
> 
> Eren is fifteen when he returns within the walls of the Liberio interment zone.
> 
> Eren is fifteen when he burst into tears and begs for forgiveness for being the only one to return.
> 
> Eren is fifteen when Carla's arms wrap around him and thanks him for coming home.
> 
> Eren has five years left to live, thanks to his "term." 
> 
> Carla will be damned if she doesn't make those five years the best that he has ever lived.


End file.
